Happy Chemo Birthday to me!! This day last year I was sitting in the MacDermott Unit hooked up to my last chemo cocktail – not a cocktail I would recommend! I’ll be sticking to Cosmos in future!
I think one year on is a good time to reflect on how far I’ve come in my recovery from chemo and radiotherapy. – that, and the fact that people have been asking me a lot about this, so I thought I’d share. Until I went through this, I had thought that once a person finished treatment and their medical team were happy, then the patient was ‘all better’. I have now come to realise that this couldn’t be further from the truth. In fact, if I hear the words ‘the side effects will pass’ once more, I think I might SCREAM! My Oncologist and chemo nurses did talk to me about the fatigue building up with each treatment, but I never expected to be still suffering one year on! It has improved with time, and most days I no longer need naps, but on days when I am busy and out and about, I know I’ll suffer for it in the days that follow – going back to bed in the morning and early nights are both common on those occasions. What I don’t remember anyone telling me was how bad the ‘brain fog’ would be. In fact, the first time I heard of ‘Chemo Brain’ it was from a Breast Cancer Forum. For someone who had a fairly good ability to focus under pressure, multi-task and generally good organisational skills, chemo brain is a MAJOR departure from the norm. My focus is not great, I can’t concentrate well and I’m easily confused. The best way I can describe it is to give you an example – this has happened on NUMEROUS occasions: My kitchen needs cleaned and tidied, but while I’m looking at it, I don’t even know where to start (I would have been on it without even thinking in the past). When I eventually do make a start, I lose concentration and jump from one thing to another, usually without even realising I’ve done it – everything gets left half done. So, half an hr later and the place manages to look WORSE than when I started!! (No Joke!) – Dishwasher and washing machine open and half empty, pots, plans, dishes and unfolded laundry everywhere! Kitchen is just such A MESS! I usually just give up at this point and go and sit down. After a while I’ll forget about it, cos that’s another thing – my memory is TERRIBLE! I mean, I regularly have conversations with people and forget what I’m saying mid-sentence!! I forget appointments (just ask my beautician!), tasks, errands and have even forgotten to pick up Béibhinn!! Top Tip: It turns out To-Do lists are only useful when you can REMEMBER to look at the flaming list!!! I’m also still suffering from physical side effects. My joints (in particular my left knee and leg) are still giving me pain and thanks to my second chemo drug, I’m still carrying a lot of fluid. Thankfully, I’ve been attending a physio at the Lymphedema Clinic – Catherine has done a great job working on my scar tissue and opening up drainage pathways in my lymphatic system, blocked following surgery and treatment. She has taught me lymphatic drainage massage techniques which I do daily to keep all the gateways open. I’m also receiving reflexology lymph drainage (RLD) to help with drainage also. I’m still carrying fluid, although it is slowly starting to go – who knows when it will be gone completely! I’ll be delighted when it does, as I’ll be finally able to wear my wedding and engagement ring again. The increase in fluid in my body has put pressure on my wrists and I now suffer from Carpal Tunnel Syndrome – in my case this means I regularly wake up at night and am unable to feel either arms from the shoulder down. Over-use of my arms during the day can also result in this. I have to let my arms hang out of the bed to get the feeling back – oh the joys! All that being said, I definitely have more energy than I did this day last year. I can now walk at a steady pace and I no longer have to sit down half way up the stairs to have a rest before continuing (I joked at one point that I was going to get a seat made for the half way point!). Well that’s all from me – I’m away to meet my friend for lunch – this day last year her and I were in the MacDermott Unit. I’m much preferring the lunch on a sunny day option! Might even have a Cosmo :-) |